230: So very typical

 She is going through the 'anger' - Confidant: 229: ... what is the point? a bit of anger from her - phase right now and starts having attacking conversations all of a sudden. 

I could just walk out of the room and say that, 'look, what is the point of this post-mortem' but I don't - I need to respond to this anger and engage with it so that she can work through the stage.

Our son's birthday weekend coming up. Apparently she 'begged' him to go to a couple of posh restaurants for dinner and lunch on Saturday and Sunday respectively. He repeatedly refused and chose a local Chinese and a not so posh jerk chicken place.

This upset her - 'I like going to nice restaurants with white, linen tablecloths. I know you don't - you are just entirely functional.'

'What has this got to do with me?!'

'I know you don't care. But I am hurt that we are not going somewhere nice.'

'It is his birthday, you have had the discussion with him. Not sure how I fit into that or why you are giving out to me.'

Then she went on - again - about how I never debated back, how arguing is part of relationships and so on and so on. Confidant: 226: I've been a bully ... and are you gay? (adult themed content!!)

A thought occurred to me later. She continues to say that instead of acquiescing I should have fought back over the years. (and I did do, on things that matter - not changing schools for our son, not spending £40k on a utility room when we had sunk well over £100k elsewhere in the house.) 

She, apparently, would have been fine with my being argumentative. But our son standing his ground and choosing the restaurants on his birthday has clearly upset her! What does she actually want ffs?!!!

And then she goes at me for not having sex since 2016 and how she had been desperate for it and had not said anything about my erectile dysfunction out of kindness to me. Fair enough - but I said that she would not have embarrassed me - it was what it was. And when we did have a sex life, it was relatively infrequent and I was the instigator almost every time, So, to think that she had a voracious appetite would be just wrong.

'You never spoke about it and I did not want to embarrass you.'

I suppose she could have spoken about it to me but I am glad she did not. I would have had to say that I am not really interested as I feel no emotional connection and could not be fussed to make the effort with viagra or similar. And I genuinely never considered that she was missing it. Does she have sex toys? Does she masturbate? I don't know but I doubt it.