Did succeed in going out for my cricket practice yesterday evening - though not before feeding our son, putting him to bed and taking out the trash!
So why this blog?
Well, while this is being written as if it were being read, in reality I am writing it for myself. I do not have a real life confidant you see.
To be fair, I do have a number of close friends - male and female - who could be confidants but why should I burden them with my crap? They have busy lives with their own constraints and my stream of consciousness misery will do them no good.
I like to think I am a reasonable genuine bloke - a nice person. Not perhaps someone with zing and pzazz but decent, friendly and solid. I have maintained friendships over many years which I value and I can say with some confidence that my friends like me. Instead of a supportive atmosphere at home I have let myself fall into a pattern where the one who should support me most (and whom I support), makes me feel not-good-enough.
And, in fact, I was a copious diary and letter writer for many years as I was growing up. Once again, I let out my frustrations on a page rather than another person. It was cathartic at the time and I hope it will be useful again.
For years now I have written down frustrations on scrappy bits of paper - and then proceeded to lose them. Here, then, is where I can keep them.
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