197: Moving along peacefully enough - and a new job

A friend texted me to ask how things were going at home. And mostly they have been fine.

Yes, there is still the occasional loss of temper and really very rude speaking on her part - there was an example yesterday when she just went on and on at our son. But he shouts back now and I have seen her back down.

I was wondering the other day how anyone could speak to someone else in that manner - angry and defensive and accusatory and plain rude. I remember my mother was the same. 

And then I thought back to how I behaved badly towards my father as he reached the later stages of amnesia - I was angry at him often. And I still do not know why I lost all my discipline with him. There is no excuse. Confidant: 122: My Father 1 (dear-confidant.blogspot.com)

Some things amuse me.

She met some friends of her parents recently. They had moved to the UK from India sometime in the 70s with very little money. The story was about the struggles they had to go through to get a house and then a loan for a car - and she presented it as ever so charming. I roll back twenty years and we have moved to Delhi on an expatriate package, living in a beautiful apartment in a prestigious part of the city (Nizamuddin East), getting our furniture custom made and there is unbelievable drama because some cupboard doesn't have lights.

But, thankfully, she is starting another job - having left her last one some months ago. Confidant: 190: The Job (dear-confidant.blogspot.com)

Hopefully she will work well and sincerely in this one and actually try to make a difference. Already, though, even before starting, she is looking at terms and conditions and whether she can work remotely in India for a couple of weeks - while spending time with her mother. A perfectly legitimate thing to do but I did suggest that she should become friends and provide excellence at work before asking for things - but maybe I am old fashioned. As a manager, while I would keep an open mind and support as much as possible, a person with a focus on the benefits even before starting would put my antenna on alert.

However, bigger picture, fingers crossed, she will find the love of her life in her new place of work and leave me!