101 - Peaceful but boundaries ...

Wow - this could be my story until recently - albeit a one-sided view and a perhaps an overstated first paragraph!


https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2016/oct/08/a-letter-to-my-wife-for-whom-i-no-longer-seem-to-exist


'At one stage, I was asked what I wanted most from you. I said I simply wanted kindness.' How resonant a sentence that is ...


Still good and we have been going to places together. Pleasant enough at home.


One thing I wanted to do was take some money from our joint account which is where my salary lands and distribute EQUAL amounts to a bank account for me and one for her; I had to open one especially as I did not have one.


I said that despite the more peaceful relationship, I would like to start this and then maintain - this I have done.


She has agreed that the new schools that she had envisaged for our son are not practical. Another parent told her that the commute was just too much - a point I had made repeatedly. But it took another to convince her. That's ok.


I have not approached her about how she spoke to my cousins behind my back or checked phones or threw away mementoes - letting those pass.


How do I feel? would be a question posed by my counsellor.


I am not sure I know.


I cannot say I love my wife - I have tried that, being vulnerable, and been kicked in the teeth and balls. On the couple of occasions we have tried, ejaculation has not happened - so, clearly, there is something psychological there. I do not believe that I will be able to trust any more - but, then, I never believed that we would get to this point?


So, it is wait and see.